Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
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