I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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