but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
