Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
