Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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