she was so not down for the gang bang
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Randomize
