So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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