My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
