u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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