it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Randomize
