ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
