Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I feel like abortions should bother me more
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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