I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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