i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
