I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
