Porn is love you can see.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
