The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
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