Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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