Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
