it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize