Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
