you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
