Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Randomize
