Sry I called you an 8
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I want to have your abortion
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Randomize
