i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Randomize
