Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
