just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
