Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
