Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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