I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
