what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
