Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
how does that bad decision feel?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
