Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
