in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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