You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
