If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Randomize
