yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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