she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
