I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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