I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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