Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
