she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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