If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
