I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
