well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
