she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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