I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
