lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
