I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Pants are for mortals
Randomize
