no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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