conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Let the clothes fall where they may.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
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